I Care Damnit!

I have an addiction.

I am addicted to the reusable cloth bags you can buy from the grocery store. Sure I feel all green and snotty when I pullout my fancy bag when asked if I want paper or plastic, but truth be told I just love these damn bags. We own like 15 and I have some everywhere, in my car, in my scooter, in my backpack. They're like between 79¢ and 99¢, so if I forget mine, I just buy a new one AND they work way better than the other bags.

Last night on our way to Kate and Alex's for HIMYM episodes we stopped to get big salads at Whole Foods (I love me a big veggie salad.) In the checkout line, of course I forgot my bag and of course they have a bunch there for sale. Then my eyes happen upon one of the fanciest little bags I have yet seen. It is all burlap and earthy feeling, it folds and zips into a perfect little clutchy/purse looking thing. As I hastily grab one I see out of the corner of my eye that the purchase will feed people in Rwanda. PERFECT!

The checker scans my little bag and then asks me, "You know what this bag is about right?"

"Yeah," I say, "it feeds people."

"It will feed 100 people in Rwanda," he says.

In my head I first think, "Awesome." Then I think, "Wait, how does my 79¢ bag feed 100 people. I mean I've been to Uganda and yes things are cheap but you can't feed 100 people on 79¢. Oh no, how much is it?"

And I say, "How much is it?"

"$25"

And before the bag actually goes across the scanner I have this full conversation and fight with the people behind me...completely in my head.

"I shouldn't buy that, I don't have $25 for a bag. I mean I am so almost always broke. Wait, if I say I don't want it now the people behind me are going to think I am an asshole and that I don't care about hunger and poverty. Oh hell. Stop judging me people...I'm going to Africa in July! See I care! I'm gonna build a school. I honestly care. Fuck."

Bleep and my new bag goes across the scanner.

In the car I tell Chris the whole story, he laughs and says he could see the whole thing happening in my head. Oh well, it is a cool bag, it fits nicely in the scooter and hey, I fed 100 people last night.